Advice and support for secondary school teachers
Normal reactions to a traumatic event
Following any distressing event it is quite normal to experience a range of reactions. Each person will respond in her/his own way. Students may show some of the following:
- Not being able to concentrate or want to do school work or make decisions
- Avoiding places, people or objects which remind them of the incident
- Physical effects such as feeling unwell, headaches, listlessness or over activity
- Nightmares, irritability Feelings of guilt and/or responsibility
- Difficulty accepting events and how they have been affected e.g. appearing over brave
- Changes in personality e.g. feeling depressed or isolated, becoming irritable or angry
- Needing to go over and over the incident which can test the patience of those closest
- Seeing or hearing the person who has died.
These reactions are all common responses and are usually short-lived, e.g. Up to four weeks. The majority of people will get over the experience with the support of family, friends and school
How to help your pupils
A traumatic event often leaves people feeling confused and unsettled, it is therefore very important to consider the following strategies
- Listen to and try to understand your pupil’s views of the event
- Give attention, reassurance and say things simply
- Allow your pupils to talk about the event and express their feeling – give them reassurance and permission to feel upset
- Check children’s understanding of the event
- Answer pupil’s questions as truthfully as possible
- Maintain daily routines both at home and at school
- Encourage healthy eating, exercise and rest
- Encourage resumption of social activities e.g. clubs
- Let children know that their reactions are as might be expected
- It can help to recall happy memories
Understanding a grieving adolescent
Adolescents are likely to:
- Have an adult understanding of death
- Experience and adult-like expression of grief
- Understand the consequence of the death - aware of future absence of deceased
- Feel that possessions of the deceased are important
- Feel that school and peers are very important
- Have moments when they idealise the person
- Turn to peers for support and want to 'fit in'
- Often take on the role of comforter in the family
- Get involved in risk taking behaviours
Useful books to read
Gilbert, I. (2010). The little book of bereavement for schools. London: Crown publishing Ltd.
Mackinnon, H. (2013). You just don’t understand: supporting bereaved teenagers. Winston’s Wish.
Rosen, M. (2004). Michael Rosen’s sad book. London: Walker