The Friends who became family

My journey into kinship care didn’t begin with a plan – it began with kindness.

My name is Perran and I live with Mel and Chris. Before I came to live where I do now, my life was very small. I didn’t really leave the house much, I’d missed a lot of school, and my world felt quite limited. Mel often says that when I first came to stay, none of us knew what would happen – it was just meant to be for Christmas, so I wouldn’t be alone.

But sometimes the biggest changes start with the simplest decisions. And after Christmas, none of us could imagine me leaving.

Mel tells people that she had never even met me before I arrived! It was her daughter Tiffany who found out I was about to be removed from my family and she asked Mel if I could live with them. Their spare room was actually a junk room, and suddenly it had to become my bedroom. Their family life shifted almost overnight.

What started as a kind gesture turned into something permanent – and something really special.

One of the biggest changes for me was school. I’d been kind of home educated for quite a long time, but when I moved in with Mel, they made sure I went straight back into a classroom. At first, I’ll admit, I tried a few tricks to get out of going. But after a few months, I settled. Now my attendance is almost 100%, and I’m predicted to do well in my GCSEs – which still surprises people who hear how much school I missed before.

Kinship care isn’t always easy. One of the hardest things is that life has more rules. There are permissions needed for things that most teenagers don’t think twice about – sleepovers, trips, even sometimes how I wear my hair. Mel always says it’s difficult watching me miss out on normal things simply because decisions take time. Sometimes by the time permission comes through, it’s already too late. And it can make you feel different.

There are moments when the system reminds you that you’re “in care”, even when your home feels completely like family. I know the rules are there to keep people safe – and I understand that – but I think adults sometimes forget how those rules feel when you’re the young person living with them.

What makes the biggest difference is being listened to.

The best thing about living in my kinship family is feeling accepted. Mel and the rest of the family have always said I’m theirs, whether we’re related by blood or not. They support my interests – like horse riding, photography, being outdoors – and they give me space when I need it, and reassurance when I don’t.

Kinship care didn’t just change my address. It changed how I feel about myself.
I’m proud of who I’m becoming. I’m happier, more confident, and more hopeful. I’ve travelled, I’ve tried new things, I’ve found things I’m good at, and maybe most importantly, I’ve learned that feeling safe gives you room to grow.

If I could leave you with one thing today, it would be this: kinship care isn’t about taking something away from a child. It’s about giving them safety, stability and a chance to become who they’re meant to be.

And when that works – it really works