The Power of Relationships

My relationships; Sustain, Support and Develop me.

I am lucky this is the case and I have been privileged to have been shown positive examples of love, friendship, and to feel valued. It feels strange to consider this a privilege rather than an expectation. However, when I entered the world of looked after children I quickly understood it to be just that, and it is something I don’t take for granted.My own significant relationships break barriers of being related by blood, and the emphasis placed upon this. My journey to motherhood did not come about through biology, and some of my closest relationships have nothing to do with ‘family’ in the traditional sense. I believe family to be what you want to make it, and for me that looks like a group of people that invest in me and I in them. My family is not traditional in its makeup but it is full of love. 

My own circles have widened in recent times with this role and it has shown me even more so the importance of a ‘village’. Fostering can be isolating; I spend a lot of time alone with the young person in my care, sometimes at 4am during a night feed and sometimes sitting in my car alone during family time. I have learnt that parenting in whatever form it takes does not happen easily in isolation, and the ability to draw upon support from a range of people makes a positive difference. Being a text away from other carers dealing with similar situations reminds me I am not alone. Being able to call a friend or family member helps  me to process the things to which I am sometimes exposed. Most importantly, my own children act as a reminder of why I want to care for these children and how important it is for their outcomes.

Meaningful relationships have an intense impact on our outcomes. Our children often suffer the trauma of broken relationships or at the very least severely dented ones. Relationships that should be some of the most important of their lives; those of their immediate families. It could be easy to vilify those who play a part in the damage but this does nothing to support the children at the heart of the relationship. 

Our craving for connection and belonging is deep rooted and is reflected in the need of our young people to feel rooted in their relationships and identity. Being able to be there to hold these children for the time they need and to support them and give them a safe place, opens me up to more relationships than I imagined. 

If you'd like to find out how you could support local children when they need it most, allowing them to maintain their local connections with people and places, please do get in touch with our team. We'll support you to support them.