Philippa and Stuart
Pip and Stuart have fostered for GCC since 2014. They specialise in short-term care for younger children, including babies and siblings.
“When the receptionist at the doctor’s surgery asked if I’d miss him, I had to take a breath before answering. What she’s asking is whether I’ve managed to guard my heart enough to be able to let him go. My answer doesn’t change much. We will miss him more than anyone can imagine and it will be unbelievably painful to see him go. We’ve taken him from a tiny vulnerable baby to a robust toddler; he adores us and we adore him. I can’t put into words how it feels so I just smile and say yes, waiting for her to say the inevitable, “I couldn’t do it”.
I respect people who are honest enough with themselves to know that they couldn’t move a child once they’ve loved them. The other comment is, “I’d get too attached”. I do too. I’m too attached after a couple of days. The thing is, these children deserve an adult who gets too attached. They deserve to be adored and to have someone who thinks they’re the best child ever. They don’t need an adult who holds back and can’t connect. Unfortunately for the carer that means it’s painful when the child moves.
We will shut the door after this little fella leaves and we will grieve. Tears will be shed and our hearts will be broken, but we know we have done our very best for him and he moves with memory boxes and albums that document our love. Every child deserves a carer who is prepared to break their heart over them. We know he has a great future ahead of him. We are watching him move feeling excited for him. We will be in his life as extra cheerleaders and people who can celebrate with him as he walks his path. He just won’t live here any more. Right now that hurts, but the pain will turn to joy in due course. We know he will continue to be loved, by his family and by us. We hold that in our hearts."